How's your relationship?

 From once upon a time to happily ever after! Oh, wait, oops! I'm thinking of a fairy tale romance. But did you know our relationship can be that way now? Having happily ever after in your relationship with your spouse (or future spouse) is highly dependant upon your relationship with your heavenly father. 

So I ask this question: How's your relationship?

I find there are a lot of varying opinions and standards when it comes to courtship/dating and what is and isn't allowed. I decided to look into it myself and see what the Lord would show me. I couldn't find a dating chapter in the Bible with a code of conduct for courtship. Neither could I find examples. Then I realized that, that makes sense. In Bible times there were arranged marriages and people were married at very young ages. That was the culture then. Courtship looks much different today. So I started looking for and discovering some practical applications. After doing some thinking and praying God reminded me that God designed marriage to be a picture and type of his relationship with his bride, the church. The choices we make during the courtship/dating process will affect our marriage and the image we portray.

For most people in relationships the days are spent "in love". Or should I say, lost in feelings. Some people allow physical contact before marriage and some don't. Either way most dream the days away till they're married thinking they have achieved happily every after. They marry the love of their lives but soon find out that the feelings wear off and they are hit with reality only to realize this person they fell in love with has "changed". They're "not the same person they fell in love with". Expectations aren't met, feelings are hurt. But the truth of the matter is, it still is the same person they "fell in love with" but they were too blinded by their feelings to truly get to know the person they were going to spend the rest of their life with. Their likes and dislikes, hobbies, quirks, and personality. Adding too much physical contact and too soon, from what I have observed, adds to those feelings that can grow to be more than they should be and distract us from getting to know the ins and outs of the person we're going to marry.

I thought of this in relation to us and our Saviour. The beginning of our relationship is the day we get saved. He's already offered it to us, it's our job to say yes or no. At the point of our salvation we are so grateful and so happy our hearts burst with love for our Saviour. All we can think about is how good he is and how sweet and loving he is. And that's good! We should remember that! But our love for the Saviour should move beyond feelings and into a deeper relationship with him. We need to get to know the person we not only are going to spend the rest of our life with but the person we will spend the rest of eternity with! As the relationship grows, the love changes and deepens. A lot of churches focus on the warm and fuzzy feelings and not the truth that will help us grow. Warm and fuzzy feelings have their place and cannot be entirely avoided but we shouldn't be so focused on feeling something that we don't truly learn about Christ. About his likes, dislikes, character, personality, what he's really like. I imagine that if we don't get to know as much as we can about him now how disappointed and ashamed we'll be when we see him face to face and can finally see the nail prints in his hands and touch the wound in his side. 

For those of you who have been married or are about to be, if you were given a test to see how well you know your spouse (or future spouse), how well would you do? Have you taken the time and put in the effort to know everything about them that you could correctly answer most if not all of the questions?

How about you Christian? If you're given a test to see how well you know your Savior how well would you do? Have you taken the time and put in the effort to know everything about him that you could correctly answer questions people ask you?

Relationships take work. Before and after marriage. It isn't always rainbows and sparkles and sunshine.

On this side of heaven, our relationship with our heavenly father takes work as well. It's not always easy but it is so worth it in the end! Even if you have to set aside your feelings and do what's right! If you keep growing in your relationship with the Lord and you keep him at the center of your life, your relationship can be happily ever after!

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:"

1 Peter 3:15 KJV

But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned them;

2 Timothy 3:14 KJV

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

2 Timothy 2:15 KJV

And further, by these, my son, be admonished: of making many books there is no end; and much study is a weariness of the flesh.

Ecclesiastes 12:12 KJV

Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

Galatians 6:7‭-‬9 KJV